Long Hiatus - Still Alive

I'm coming back after a long hiatus.

Tbh, this post kinda just went everywhere and anywhere it wants;
it really isn't the usuals. dunno if i'll scrap it eventually.



"Valentione's Day & Final Steps of Faith (1st time)" is the last entry I've written since I began the hiatus.
It wasn't mentioned or anything, I just kinda left.
I wouldn't be surprised if I just left right here and now again without posting more, but I'm trying to avoid that.

I noticed that I hadn't spoiler-protect "Valentione's Day" posts, because navigating right of the image viewer straightaway brought it into some HW spoilers. Man... I think I forgot about that when I neglected the blog. That should be fixed now, I'm sorry if anyone saw it and got spoiled for it.

I take pride in what the post, not wanting to settle for half-fleshed out events.
So that realization startled and hurt me a little.

I also wanted to preserve as authentic a memory / gpose as I could remember them by.
The date, time and all, along with the vibe and feelings it brought.

As the content from my various experiences grew,
    I became conscious of how the many photos were eatting away at the disk space
    (despite having like... terabytes of space)

    While downloading the pics I uploaded up on Google Photos for this blog, I realized that they didn't contain the descriptions I added in as part of the pictures' metadata.
    I read from somewhere that if I had edited it prior to upload, that it'll be retained and carried over when downloading.

    I thought:
    Maybe I should conquer this space and sorting dissatisfaction at once.

    And while all of that was happening, as with most Free Trial players would relate to;

    My inventory, as well as quests in FFXIV bloated up as I progressed, slowing down the main progress.
    It started beginning to feel like a chore that I always had to get out of the way before any fun happens.

    There were times I just feel like playing with close friends to take photos,
    as that means more to me than just rushing in Unsynced, or with Pubs who'll just leave right after the Duty is done.

    I think, after a while, I've grown a bit more independent in terms of that,
    but solo-queuing still has its own sets of queue or team competence problems.

From time to time,
    sometimes the stress of work
    and unfulfilled creativity
    (like I wanna write a story, but its constantly getting reality-checked or being criticized for an unnatural flow or logic..
    maybe I'm just not great at sticthing together a coherent story.
    you know how when you're young and could draw comics, without a care if its realistic or not?
    kinda just want to be as free as that again, but the mind won't let me)

    sometimes the mini existential crisis I'd get from living stagnantly at home,
    not wanting to head out, just abiding to stay safe at home during these times of Covid.
    Animes, Mangas, and various things on youtube helps as a great distractor of that.

    The mental toils and fatigue.
    Its kinda hard to get an actual change of pace with the restrictive measures in place,
    the consensus I adopt in my mind.
    Somewhere in me, risks became non-existent. It wasn't even a choice.

And somewhere along those lines, before I knew it, I stopped caring to blog.
  
  I kinda wonder... why I resort to writing 1st-world-problem negative stuffs like this.
  It'd be pretty pretentious following up with "But I'm hesistant to write this rant..." material, right after that line.
  
  I am hesitant,
  but I feel like I should just respect and accept all that I've been dealing with.
  It's not like... something of SCP Keter-levels of world ending Bad.
  Still, alive and moving in circles probably
  Round, and maybe square, just like my personality.
  
  Meta-talk; I can't really Preview this post as I'm writing it.
  Sure, I can see some the written text in the correct style...
  but the stuffs in the accordions (that expand/collapse) that I made;
  Preview doesn't allow me to interact with it, hence not being able to expand and view it;
  
  Much like viewing a Dynamic Text, that had been rasterized, and no longer dynamic and easily editable on a Paint software.
  
  I'm hoping I can do this in the 1st take, as oppose to having to re-edit the posts again and again;
  but that'll still be what I'm most likely going to do.
  I can already see it.
  The first try will result in a bunch of <pre> texts beginning with unjustly indented whitespace for tabs on this WYSIWYG HTML editor on Blogspot.
  
  Wouldn't have been the first. But hey, writing about it here is a first.
  Publish.. Here goes-;
  Edit: I forgot to make this a <pre>; u know what. im gonna leave the unjustly indent.
  ppl love seeing glitches happen in game. something about the beauty of Entropy

Kay the ranting deconstructive parts are over...
Construction rebegins, hopefully;

The momentum isn't as strong as back when I first started earlier in the game;
but I still do have a blast every once a while.

Edit: and a mountain / 2 expansion experience worth of contents; if i may add. spoiler-protection will be "fun";

I hope to capture them in the various newer posts (if i do begin posting again).